Embracing the Outsider’s Edge: How My Uniqueness Became My Superpower

Growing up, my parents instilled in me the values of authenticity, independence, and excellence. They encouraged me to go out into the world and do my best, to make a positive impact with skill, effort, and above all, authenticity. Standing out for doing these things and doing them well was something I was taught to embrace. I believed that the qualities that set me apart were my strengths, and I carried that confidence with me into adulthood.

But as I ventured into the professional world, I quickly found that being the person I had been raised to be—authentic, independent, and excellent—was not always welcomed with open arms. Instead of being celebrated, I was often judged for being exactly the woman I had been raised to be. It was as if I had been nurtured to be a jar of mustard in a world that expected me to be a bottle of ketchup.

My "mustard-ness" was suddenly seen as either "too much" or "not enough." I was labeled as unconventional, and not in a good way. It was an odd and uncomfortable experience, and it didn’t take long for this to go from a one-off encounter to an everyday struggle. I found myself falling short of others' expectations, and I couldn’t understand why the qualities that had once been celebrated were now the basis for judgment and disconnection.

This new reality was confusing, leading me down a path of self-doubt and shame. Feeling like an outsider, I didn’t know how to adjust or conform in a way that others approved of. It felt as though there was something fundamentally wrong with me, and as a result, I started playing smaller and smaller. I withdrew into myself, afraid that my authentic self was inherently flawed and that to fit in, I needed to become someone else.

You may not have known this about me, but it’s true. For years, I struggled with these feelings of inadequacy and isolation. It was a lonely and isolating experience, especially when it seemed that everyone around me was effortlessly floating in and out of social and professional settings. I would often wonder what was wrong with me for feeling this way when others appeared so comfortable and accepted. The constant pressure to fit into a mold that didn’t align with my true self was exhausting, and the more I tried to conform, the more disconnected I felt from myself and others.

It wasn’t until recently that I had a breakthrough, a shift in perspective that changed everything. I realized that feeling like an outsider didn’t mean there was something wrong with me. Instead, it was simply part of the deal, part of the unique experience of being authentically myself in a world that often values conformity over individuality.

This realization was liberating. I began to see that my "outsider" status wasn’t a flaw; it was, in fact, a strength. My differences, the very qualities that made me feel like I didn’t fit in, were actually my superpower. They allowed me to view situations from an outsider's perspective, gaining insights that others might miss. This new perspective transformed my life, enabling me to embrace my uniqueness as a source of power and a way to connect with others who share similar experiences.

I started to understand that my feelings of being "too much" or "too little" were not reflections of my worth, but rather indications that I was living authentically. My uniqueness, rather than being something to hide, was something to celebrate. It gave me what I now call the "Outsider’s Edge."

The Outsider’s Edge is the advantage you gain when you fully embrace your individuality and use it to see the world differently. It’s the ability to approach situations with fresh eyes, to innovate, and to create connections that might otherwise be overlooked. It’s the power to help others work through their own unique feelings of outsider-ness, offering them the support and understanding that I once so desperately needed.

This journey of self-acceptance has taught me that the world doesn’t need another bottle of ketchup—it needs jars of mustard, relish, and every other unique flavor that people bring to the table. Diversity, in all its forms, is what makes life rich and full. When we embrace our differences and see them as strengths, we contribute to a world that is more inclusive, creative, and connected.

I’ve come to realize that the very qualities that made me feel like an outsider are the same ones that allow me to make a meaningful impact. By staying true to myself, I’ve been able to carve out a space where I can thrive, not despite my differences, but because of them. And I’m not alone in this—many people feel like outsiders at different points in their lives, especially in environments that prioritize conformity over creativity.

If you’ve ever felt like an outsider, I want you to know that you’re not alone, and there’s nothing wrong with you. In fact, your outsider status may just be your greatest asset. It gives you a unique perspective, a way of seeing the world that others might miss. It allows you to bring something new and valuable to the table, something that only you can offer.

So, can you relate to the outsider feeling? Have you ever felt like you didn’t quite fit in, like you were expected to be something you’re not? If so, I encourage you to embrace those feelings, to see them not as weaknesses but as strengths. The Outsider’s Edge is real, and it’s powerful. It’s what allows us to innovate, to connect, and to make a difference in the world.

By leaning into our uniqueness, we not only find our own path to success, but we also pave the way for others to do the same. The world needs more of us to step into our power, to be the jars of mustard in a world of ketchup, and to embrace the Outsider’s Edge with confidence and pride.